This morning our President, Dan Wolgemuth, shared from Luke 24: 13-35, where Jesus appears to two of his disciples as they travel on the road to Emmaus. President Dan’s message was that Jesus is with us in the “lag time”–in this passage it represents the time when the disciples are still trying to figure out what happened after the resurrection and what to tell others.  As they walk along (with downcast eyes), Jesus shows up and asks (my paraphrase), “What’s up?”  Their response was (again, my paraphrase)–”Have you been living under a rock?!” and go on to tell Jesus (although they don’t recognize him) all that happened over the past few days–the crucifixion, resurrection and empty tomb.

After listening, Jesus then goes on to tell them the entire story of what he (still unknown to them) understands from Scripture.  They invite this stranger to stay with them for dinner and once Jesus breaks bread, their eyes are opened to Jesus and he disappears. They ask each other, “weren’t our hearts burning when He walked with us?”

The lesson to me this morning at The Cove–Jesus is with me in the “lag time”…those moments, hours, even days when I wonder if He is walking with me in the difficult times. When the sky is the darkest, when there doesn’t seem to be a solution, when I feel lost in my way…Jesus is still walking with me. Just like these men on the road to Emmaus–He is there, He never leaves, He’s always faithful.  An encouraging message to start my day.

She went on to tell me about a group of young ladies she has been mentoring for the past year. These girls are all from the Hilltop and Eastside of Tacoma and many  have had some difficult troubles in their recent past.  Cheryl asked them, “What will keep you from getting back into trouble, from ending up back in Remann Hall (Pierce County’s juvenile detention center)?”  One of the common responses was the powerful impact of SOZO, Tacoma YFC’s City Life outreach that takes place every Tuesday at the People’s Center.  ”Bobby, these girls couldn’t say enough good about your staff–their love, persistence, creativity and the many ways they go out of their way to mentor and guide these young ladies.  They love SOZO!”

Now, I’ll be the first to say that my “gifting” is not as a general contractor and that’s exactly what a good part of my time has been filled with over the past few weeks: working with an architect, getting permits, coordinating framers, electricians, sheet rock work, etc. But my discomfort with tackling these duties was quickly washed away when Cheryl shared this story of the power of getting into the “messy” lives of young people who are out of control and the incredible potential found in the hearts of kids like those in her small group.

Our hope is to move into that 1500 sq ft of remodeled office the first week of June.  I can’t wait for more partnership opportunities with organizations like Allen Renaissance–we’re so blessed to be a part of God’s work across Pierce County.  Psalm 13:6 comes to mind–”I will sing to the Lord, for he has been good to me.”

For the past several years our City Life ministry team has been doing some fantastic collaborative outreach work with Allen Renaissance, Incorporated (ARI)– a non profit borne out of Allen A.M.E. church– and ARI has become a key ministry partner.  As the Lord continues to open new doors, especially broadening our reach through our foster care ministry it became apparent that there wasn’t “enough room at the inn” at our current offices.  In fact, Jeff Clare (foster care director) and I have been talking about this opportunity to expand our offices but often that talk would end with the phrase, “where in the world do we go?”

It’s amazing how the Lord provides!  During our dreaming phase with the rest of our TYFC Leadership Team our wish list included the following: 4-6 offices, plenty of cubicle space, a conference room, kitchen and–if possible–a multi purpose room for large group meetings.  Oh, and we hoped/prayed to get such an office space for below market rate.  Just over a month ago as Darrin Miller was scouting out temporary space for his team  Cheryl Jones, ARI Executive Director, approached him and told about 1500 sq ft of office space in the facility they just moved into at 1321 MLK.  The entire facility is over 17,000 sq ft and they were beginning to look for partners to move in and lease space.  Guess what this facility has…yep, a conference room, kitchen, huge meeting space and nearly 1500 sq ft of office space that we can remodel to include 6 new offices! Plus, they gave us a fantastic rate…what a blessing.

So, one and a half weeks ago Tacoma YFC signed a 3 year lease to expand into these offices at 1321 MLK, the Allen Renaissance Building. We’re waiting on our remodel permits from the city and are enlisting framing contractors, painters, sheet rockers and carpet people to help in the remodel process. Once the remodel is finished (our goal is by the end of May) the City Life, Campus Life, and Juvenile Justice ministry teams AND myself will be moving to these new offices.

All of this will allow Foster Care to continue to grow and utilize the existing office space on Center St as well as open more partnership opportunities on Tacoma’s Hilltop with ARI.  So grateful for the Lord’s guidance and providing exactly what we need.

So last week when Jeff and Anna invited me to speak again I was humbled to stand in front of 60 of these parents who are on the frontlines of some difficult, heart wrenching and often overwhelmingly rewarding ministry.  As several foster parents have asked for the audio or type written version of that message here’s a “Readers Digest-blog ready” version:

Being a father of three daughters and husband of one wife, commandeering the TV to watch sports is a rather rare occasion.  But at this time of year my family understands that Daddy may lapse into a March Madness coma with the beginning of the NCAA mens basketball tournament. I love the tradition, the team spirit and the competition. When I think of March Madness one name always comes to mind–John Wooden–one of my personal heroes.  John Wooden coached the UCLA Bruins in the 60s and 70s and was a man a bit out of his element coming from the MidWest.  With his Jimmy Stewart morals and sensible shoes Coach Wooden would often begin the first day of practice with a lesson on how to properly tie one’s shoes or put on one’s socks so as to avoid getting blisters. He even had rules that seemed antiquated: no behind the back passes, no retiring of jerseys and no facial hair. One day a player confronted Coach Wooden, “Coach, I have my rights and I’m growing out this beard. You can’t make me shave it off!” Coach Wooden looked up at this young man and said, “I respect someone who stands up for what they believe. And we’re going to miss you on this team.”  This young man stormed off only to reappear at the end of practice–shaved face and all. That young player, Bill Walton, rarely questioned Coach Wooden’s rules again.

Although we can look in the record books and see the “legacy” that Coach Wooden left behind (10 NCAA championships, a team that won 88 straight games, players such as Walt Hazzard, Bill Walton, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar just a few among others having gone onto Hall of Fame careers), his desire was to build young men who would become great dads, husbands and contributors to society.  To this day, he still knows the whereabouts of nearly every one of his former players because many call him to get the same pearls of wisdom he shared on the courts at UCLA.

Tonight I want to challenge you as foster parents to consider what your “legacy” is to these children you dare to take into your home.  When I think of a “legacy” in Scripture I’m drawn to the account in Mark, chapter 14, verses 1-9 where Jesus is anointed at Bethany. This takes place during the final week of Jesus’ life and here we see a woman (referred to in the gospel of John as Mary) who breaks open a jar of pure nard and pours it over Jesus’ head.  She is immediately rebuked for having wasted something that could be valued at one years wages and frivolously throwing it away. Her critics argument? “This could’ve been used for the poor.”

What grabs my attention is the response from Jesus himself: (verse 6) “Leave her alone. Why are you bothering her? She has done a beautiful thing to me. The poor you will always have with you, and you can help them anytime you want. But you will not always have me. She did what she could. She poured perfume on my body beforehand to prepare my body for burial. I tell you the truth, wherever the gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will be told, in memory of her.”

Have you ever felt like people around you, your family, acquaintances at the grocery store, and others are looking at you and saying, “Are you nuts to bring these ‘broken’ kids into your family? Can’t you just sent money to an organization or something?” Have you ever felt rejected or scorned because you’ve chosen the sometimes lonely and often difficult ministry of foster care?  I can remember clearly the time in my life when I felt most rejected. It happened over the dinner table at Christmas time during my junior year at the University of Washington.  As my sweet grandmother innocently asked me, “So, how is preparation for physical therapy school going?” little did she realize the Pandora’s box she was about to open.  So I jumped in with both feet and dropped the bombshell (it seemed tactful at the time), “I’m not going to physical therapy school–I really feel God is calling me to youth ministry.”  Time stopped and I still remember my mom and dad staring at me like I had grown three extra arms.

The next day my dad called me into the garage. In my family perhaps you drove your car into the garage or decided to get a tool from the garage…but it was never a good sign to be “invited” into the garage by my father. Little (or nothing) good could come from that. He immediately began to tell me that I was a failure, an embarassment to the family and was about to amount to nothing. Only by God’s strength and the power of the Holy Spirit was I able to keep it together.  Trust me, I know what it feels like to be rejected.

Yet, I’m struck by the “rightness” (yes, I just made that word up) of what this woman in Mark 14 did.  Those around her were screaming, “Are you crazy?” and yet the Lord was smiling and giving his approval.  Approval to the point that “wherever the gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her.”

As foster parents you make the “crazy” decision every day to open your house, to “expose” your own flesh and blood to the “dangers” of out of control foster children.  Many of these kids come from horrific backgrounds and difficult birth parents but it simply doesn’t matter to you–you KNOW God has called you this ministry.  When it seems the most painful, when you’re at the end of your rope–remember that the God of the Universe is overjoyed with your sacrifice and extravagant love.  The way you care for these children, the way you graft them into your family, the effort you make to show love to these birth parents is “pouring perfume” on our Lord.

Living in a house with four women is one thing. It’s a whole new game when the perfume starts flying.  I’m preparing myself for the day when a cloud of sweet smelling aroma is wafting through the Arkills house.  In Mark 14, in the final week of Jesus’ life, this woman “left a legacy” for Jesus in anointing his body for burial. To her it was a sacrifice (one years wages!) but this sacrifice also left an “aroma” that carried with Jesus for days to come…through his final week on earth. I’ve heard it taught that this perfume in Mark 14, “nard”, was not only very expensive but was often reserved for anointing royalty.  That’s exactly what this woman was doing.

In loving these foster children, you are doing the same. You are sharing the “aroma of Christ” (2 Cor. 2:15) for the world to see, hear and believe.  Three truths stand out to me when I think of the legacy you (and I) leave on our children and those we take into our homes:

1) Extravagant love is encouraged–this woman’s act of “frivolity” was looked upon with joy and gratefulness by Jesus. Your crazy love–over the top, against the grain of society, unlike any other these hurting foster children have experienced–is encouraged and rewarded.

2) Our love and sacrifice for our children is a mere glimpse of the Father’s love for us. When I began in youth ministry with YFC back in 1991 I thought I knew it all. I wish I had a video of my giving “tips” to parents of teenagers!  Now that I have three little girls I realize how little I truly know. But I also realize daily how much I love them…and I’m coming to realize more and more how much the Father is crazy about me.

3) Every day, you and I have the opportunity to leave a legacy of the “aroma” of Christ. Every word, every action, every thought we pour into those we love and interact with is a chance to share the love of Jesus to a hurting world.

Thank you for serving the Lord through Foster Care. Just like that night 8 years ago, I stand here humbled and honored to call you sisters and brothers in Christ.  You are my heroes.

West Virginia’s star player, Da’Sean Butler drove to the basket, planted his foot and fell to the court in pain.  Replays showed (and why they continued to show them, I don’t understand) his left knee buckling and we all knew he was done for the evening and quite a bit longer.  West Virginia’s controversial and tough coach, Bob Huggins, came storming onto the floor to complain to the official and then he saw the pain on Da’Sean’s face.  It was in the moments that followed that my perception of Coach Huggins completely changed. I’ve always seen him as a gruff, complaining, overbearing coach who rarely smiled and always yelled.

But in that moment Bob Huggins dropped to the court next to Da’Sean and gently cupped his face in his hands and whispered words of solace into this young man’s ear.  Now, my girls can tell when I’m about to cry and Kelsey asked, “Dad, are you ok?” I told her to watch the TV screen and see the compassion, the love, and tenderness this coach is showing to this star senior player. Da’Sean was inconsolable and (as was told in interviews afterward) kept telling his coach that he was sad to let the team down and if they needed him he would get it taped up and be back on the floor.  Coach Huggins just kept holding this young man and telling him he had nothing to be ashamed of…he was proud to be his coach and everything was going to be alright.

That was one of the most moving and incredible moments I’ve ever witnessed in sports.  I’ve seen plenty of athletes grit it out and put on amazing performances but never before have I seen this kind of gentleness and compassion from coach to player.  It reminded me of the words of the Psalmist in Psalm 116: 5–”The Lord is gracious and righteous; our God is full of compassion. The Lord protects the simplehearted; when I was in great need, he saved me.”

Bob Huggins’ display of compassion moved me today to consider God’s great compassion for me, his son who strays and gets hurt and tries so hard to impress Him.  It reminded me that his compassion and grace are not based on my performance or achievement. He simply loves me daily because I am His creation. Yesterday we celebrated and remembered Easter, God’s power and love expressed in Jesus’ dying on the cross for you and me and being raised from the dead. My sin is conquered, my past is forgotten and I can walk in confidence with the power of God’s Spirit renovating my life all because the bonds of death could not hold Jesus in the grave.

Thanks, Coach Huggins, for not being afraid to show your players (and the world) just how much you really care. And thank you, Jesus, for “when I was in great need, he saved me.”

Last Wednesday morning we received word of God pouring new resources and partnerships specifically into two of those areas: Collaborative Community Strategy and Adults Who Empower, via some great news from Darrin Miller, TYFC City Life Director.  That morning he passed onto me an email stating that the DeVos Urban Leadership training was coming to Tacoma in 2011. Darrin and a group of YFC City Life leaders from across the country have had the privilege of going through the past 15 months of intense training on how to raise up indigenous urban leadership and reach your city for Christ working in collaboration with others.  The DeVos foundation typically chooses a “city” to recruit and train leaders over a 15 month period andYouth for Christ/USA was the first organization that could hand choose 10-12 leaders from around the country to take part in this training.

Darrin would be the first to say that this training has been rigorous, stretching and has helped him look at leadership in fresh new ways.  Although Darrin was away quite a bit for training conferences and retreats, the benefits to Tacoma YFC have been tremendous with new insights, ideas and strategies to make a difference right here in Pierce County.

Over the past six months Darrin has met with the DeVos leadership and shared the momentum of urban ministry here in Tacoma and we’ve hoped and prayed that they would allow our city to take part in the training. God has answered these prayers…Tacoma will be the site for 2011, Seattle for 2012 and then either Tacoma or Seattle in 2013.

All of us are VERY excited to see who the Lord brings forward as the City Coordinator (a local person) as well as the class of participants that will apply and be chosen. Please pray with us as the DeVos foundation seeks God’s will and the right people to be involved.  I know this investment by this generous foundation will bring incredible fruit in changed leaders, changed kids and changed communities!

The other day one of our Tacoma City Life staff, Doug Jonson, shared the story of his journey to help a City Life alum find a good job. The young lady he was helping comes from a very difficult background and, prior to giving her life to Jesus Christ, had very little marketable job experience.  In fact, she was known as one of the most notorious young female gang leaders in Tacoma. That was before she met Christ while locked up in Remann Hall.

Doug approached one employer with whom he’s come to know well over the past several years and asked if Air might fit on this man’s business team.  With hesitation but understanding the value of honesty and being upfront, Doug shared Air’s background and journey to start new in life.  Most employers would’ve simply told Doug that the chances for success were too small that they couldn’t take a risk with Air.

But this business leader looked at Doug and said, “You’re my resume, Doug. I’ll check out her references but I trust your judgement. If she’s ok with you, I’ll give her a shot.”  The great news is Air has found a home at this new job and is excelling in so many ways.

Wow…”you’re my resume”.  What a powerful example of the impact our lives, our decisions, the way we carry ourselves and, most importantly, represent Jesus Christ, can have on others.  The apostle Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 5:20 that we are to be “Christ’s ambassadors” and also in 2 Cor. 2:15 that “we are the aroma of Christ”.

Air’s prospective employer didn’t need to look any further than Doug to know if this young lady was worth taking a chance on…and the results have so far been fantastic.  It made me think, “What kind of aroma am I giving? Does my life point people to or away from Christ? Could I be someone’s ‘resume’?”

Doug’s persistence in living a God honoring life and faithfully pouring into kids like Air is a great example and inspiration to me.  Way to go, Doug.

To read more about Airfeaira and the “proverbs” she sends daily to Doug Jonson, click here

The importance of this technology reminded me of a conversation I had with one of our ministry partners/donors. I’ve tried to connect with Mark for quite a while but his work schedule rarely allowed time to sneak away for lunch. One day he was flying to California and the next to Chicago..always on the road. Add to that raising three kids (two teenagers!) and he was barely keeping it all together.

In my role as Executive Director here at Tacoma YFC I see my greatest ministry to our ministry partners/donors. Which is why I consistently pray for and encourage those who help make this work happen. So, last week I dropped a quick email to Mark with the oft repeated question (to the point that it’s a bit of an inside joke between the two of us), “Hey, if you’re free let’s grab lunch sometime in the next few weeks.” I was surprised to get an email within the hour from Mark.  He went on to quickly share that it was a difficult time as one of his best friends, only 47 years of age, had just suddenly passed away and he was preparing to travel internationally to this man’s service . I offered to pray for Mark and said the invitation still stood for when life returned to (semi) normal.

Just an hour after that email conversation Mark wrote, “Hey, let’s grab lunch this week, maybe Friday?” We set it up and met today for a great meal together and catchup conversation that covered the last two years.  He shared the difficulty of hearing that his friend had passed away but that this tragedy alerted him to the importance of reconnecting with key people. Thus, the email to me to actually put lunch on the calendar.  We had a great time today and now I know more specifically how to pray for Mark.

Lunch today and the pain of Mark’s friend’s death helped to remind me of a something I read from Steven Covey to “keep first things first”.  As a father of 3 young children, husband of one wife, leader of TYFC and child of God I need to continually remind myself what is really important.  It’s all about relationships and the richness I give and get from each one–my relationship with my Savior is first, with my wife 2nd, my children a close 3rd then those good friends who are my accountability, sounding boards and confidantes.

It’s not about accomplishment or checking items off a list. Those will all pass away…but relationships will bring the depth, wisdom and love I need to keep going daily.  Just another good reminder to “keep first things, first”.

Here in Pierce County alone there are over 70,000 11-18 year olds, YFC’s primary target audience.  If we run the numbers of those kids that Tacoma YFC is reaching each year (4,000) plus add in in fellow youth ministries such as Young Life, FCA and the thousands of kids already reached by local churches and youth groups, our best estimation is that there are still 50,000 kids who aren’t being reached– 50,000!  When we did that math last month at some of our strategic planning meetings I was stunned and humbled.

How do we impact those kids? It’s obvious to us at TYFC that we can’t do it alone but rather we need to be “catalysts” for Kingdom work across Pierce County. We need Young Life and FCA and local churches to join us on high school and middle school campuses, we need their expertise and partnership in neighborhoods and communities alike.  The Great Commission won’t happen on it’s own…and it won’t be accomplished by one organization but rather through Christians uniting together to reach lost kids with the life changing message of Jesus.

This “burden” to reach the every was brought home as our Truman Campus Life director, Ken Schmidtke, shared a story about one of the kids he’s working with, Ethan.  As Ken was visiting Truman MS at lunch a couple of weeks ago he caught sight of Ethan out of the corner of his eye.  With long straggly hair and eyes focused on the floor directly below, Ethan was clearly communicating one simple message–”I want to be anonymous”.  Ken walked over and began a conversation with Ethan that day and for the next several days said hi until finally Ethan began to open up.

Ethan can’t stand large groups but finds his “identity” in online chat rooms. “I can be myself there…no one knows me by name and I like it that way.”  Ethan will probably never come to Campus Life nor show up on his own to a youth group but he would be reached through some sort of online interaction. Although it may not be relational in approach, we need to think of creative ways to connect with other “Ethans” across Pierce County.  Ken walked away and his mind was racing, “How do we meet him on his level? Who do I find that knows that better than I do?”

Reaching the “every”…50,000…one at a time. Daunting, overwhelming…yes…but “do-able” through the power and unity of God’s power. Just some thoughts.

In 2008 Twitter had 6 million members and in 2009 that number jumped 200% to 18 million. I figured it was about time for Tacoma YFC to jump on board (yes, the cutting edge technology practician that I am…only behind a couple of years).

I’m hoping that more of our TYFC staff will sign up and use this great tool of Twitter as well as Facebook to connect with people across Pierce County and share what God is doing in the lives of young people through the ministries of Tacoma YFC. Oh, and if you would like to follow me on Twitter you can find me @bobbyarkills !